The Men That Don't Fit In

If they just went straight they might go far
They are strong and brave and true;
But they're always tired of the things that are,
And they want the strange and new.

- "The Men Who Don't Fit In" by Robert Service 

After the Seattle Seahawks routed the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XLVIII, Pete Carroll was asked about his expectations for the next season. With the celebration still swirling around him, he gave an answer that was dissected across sports radio the next day, mostly in not-so-favorable terms, 

“The first meeting that we’ll have will be tomorrow. That starts tomorrow. Our guys would be surprised if we didn’t. We really have an eye on what’s coming, and that we don’t dwell on what just happened. We’ll take this in stride, and we’ll have a big celebration on Wednesday in town and enjoy the heck out of it. Everybody will enjoy the heck out of it. We won’t miss the fun part of it, but that doesn’t mean we can’t set our sights on how this is going to go...We’ll be battling and competing...We’ll get going (with the) next challenge."

The critics were outraged. Coach Carroll was taking the Super Bowl in stride? What "next challenge" is there? The crowing achievement of his career...and he's going back to work tomorrow!?

The truth is, nobody prepares you for the after. For so long, high performance individuals and teams focus on a singular goal: perfection in their craft. You try so hard to accomplish it and once you have it, it feels like you have nothing. There's a phantom itch left by the late night meetings, practice sessions, dress rehearsals, and camaraderie built up over weeks, months, or even years of preparation. The next morning you wake up with the Lombardi Trophy and the realization the thing you really craved was the feeling of "family" you had grown to know and love, and in the coming days that would be spread across a city or even across the country, never to have that moment again.

It's a stark realization I'm coming to grips with after three wonderful productions of "Fiddler On The Roof." A Super Bowl victory it is not, but the time I spent in rehearsal and waiting backstage for the roar of the audience is just as memorable to me. I forged relationships, had lots of fun, and saw the best actors and actresses our church and city had to offer turn in as dominant a performance as the Legion of Boom. And today, the day after, I woke up with that familiar feeling rising up inside of me. I gravitated to that interview by Coach Carroll as a sign of what to do next. His guiding principle of "Always Compete" has served me well and it was a joy to watch something you've applied in your life succeed on such a big stage like the Super Bowl. As I read the interview again, I smiled and it clicked.

As kids, we always look for the next thing to climb. Whatever is bigger or higher or stronger, we resolve out of will, pride, or pure childish naivete to conquer. The fascination with climbing has taken us to the moon and back as humans; and it should have dawned on me earlier: it's about the climb. The goal is a waypoint, the relationships and rehearsals an anchor. What Fiddler has prepared me to do is launch myself into the next challenge and even further out of my comfort zone, knowing I have the love and support of a congregation behind me, confidence in myself inside of me, and a Life WithOut Limits in front of me. The memories I made will be just that, but everything else should not be discarded. They are the tools I'll have to use to get back to that feeling, this time with another team. The Seahawks will return next year and many things will be different. But at the heart of the team concept set forth by Coach Carroll will be the same goal: perfection at your craft. And just like my beloved cast of Fiddler, the players and coaches will approach their lives knowing what it is like to be at the top, but realizing what's truly important in the journey.

How to WinForever

Always Compete. 

It's the easiest way to describe my life philosophy. Everything is a game to me and the best way to get my best is to challenge me in something. Even if it's entirely insignificant, I'll work like hell to beat you at it. Now this doesn't mean I'm a terrible, obsessive person. I love to help others and make everyone around me better. I just love to work at something until I get it right. Until I do at a level it's never been done before.

I was glad to stumble across WinForever by Pete Carroll. In Coach Carroll I found a kindred spirit. A person who lived to compete. Now some people don't like him. That's understandable. Some people don't like me. I don't turn it down a notch. I don't have an off button. It's how people like us survive. Toning down the competition means losing focus on the race we're running. I tried that in college. It didn't work. That actualization is what's fueling me right now. Along with a lot of caffeine. Coach Carroll outlined his philosophy in three rules and three beliefs:

3 Rules to WinForever

1. Always Protect The Team - This one is easy. Protect the ones closest to you. Make your first priority the team. Not yourself. 

2. No Whining, No Complaining, No Excuses - Shut up and do your job. Stick to the assignments. The only thing you're doing while whining is making the task at hand harder. If you put your nose down and finish the job, there simply won't be anything left for you to complain about. 

3. Be Early - I've been following this one my entire life. Show initiative. Set the example. 

3 Beliefs to WinForever

1. It's All About The Ball - To paraphrase Joe Vitt, "When you have the ball, the hopes, dreams, and aspirations of every team member is in your hands." If that's not enough pressure, everyone else that doesn't like is punching like crazy hoping you'll fumble. Don't drop the ball.

2. Everything Counts - There is nothing insignificant about you or your life. Everyone has a God-given talent and the ability to be great. Will you be great?

3. Respect Everyone - I've gotten in trouble with this one. The best thing you can be is humble. You may hate the guy in front of you, but he's there for a reason. Work hard to beat him, but pick up and realize what he's doing to be better than you. That way you gain the respect of your peers and gain a competitive advantage. 

After you figure out the base to your philosophy, it's time to actualize it. Make it happen. Every thing you do outside of your game or job or whatever you do is practice. Practice doesn't make perfect. It makes you realize your strengths and weaknesses and gives you an arena in which to fix them and get better. Nobody's perfect, but that's the joy of competition. You can get as close as humanly possible when you're performing at your best. Also, I don't believe in luck. I believe in practice (talking to you Allen Iverson). Practice is your luck laboratory. If you're getting better, those breaks that always happen to other people will start to happen to you. Don't trick yourself into thinking that clutch manifests itself only in the fourth quarter. Every goal you score leads to that moment. Clutch recognizes clutch. 

When you step into that competition, I want you to think of the final result. Have confidence in yourself and trust in you and your teammates abilities. Get into your own zone. Get the opponent throwed off. I can't guarantee you a victory but I can guarantee you'll play better than you ever have. 

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Now play is a key to me as well. In fact, it's my raison d'etre. Take these five things from neuroscientist Beau Lotto, his definition of play:

• Celebrating uncertainty.
• Adaptable to change.
• Open to possibility.
• Cooperative.
• Intrinsically motivated.

I love the first bullet. It was hard to come around to but I have learned to embrace uncertainty. If you really believe that God has a plan for your life, why aren't you excited about the unknown? Sure there will be good and there will be bad but God sees you through the bad and to the good. I can't wait for the rest of my life, wherever it takes me.

Play is God's way of celebrating uncertainty, and the best way for us as humans to grow is to step into the unknown. This is where the innovations and imaginations that fuel modern humanity are. And it's as simple as a child's laugh to find. Kids are the most innovative, imaginative humans on the planet. They create something literally out of nothing. That's why I love to work with kids. They teach me more than I teach them. As adults we need to think like children. We are far too wired into our existence to create anything exciting. We love to drone to work, drone to home, drone to the TV. Don't be a drone! We have enough people like that. Be something uncertain. Be something joyous. Be play. And that's my philosophy.

Play + Competition = Paulie. 

Ten Thousand Hours

Nobody is perfect but EVERYONE will have moments of "inspired brilliance." Every shot will go in, every ball will be hit, everything will be wonderful.

But it doesn't mean you won't suck sometimes. No matter how hard you try to prevent it, we all will have off days. And you'll feel like crap. You'll think you have let your team down. You'll think you have let yourself down.

The great thing about performance is that it's not static. There is always room for improvement. If you compete at your highest level, there is no "working harder" after a loss, because you'd have worked that hard every day before that. That's where you want to be: at the height of your peak performance. This way, when the inevitable valley comes, you'll be prepared to fight like hell to get back to the top. And it'll be easy.

Don't be dismayed and discouraged because it comes easier to other people. "It" is different for everyone. Their talents are different than yours. God made you into a unique, special person and He wants you to find your individual talents and make them your own. He also gave us the ability to be great at anything.

But when someone says you have "it," they know. Be that person. 

Sometimes, it just takes a little bit more work. Ok, a lot more work. But every rep, every shot, every little thing you do is making you better. Either you're getting better or going nowhere. Don't make excuses. If you preface everything you do with, "Oh, I wasn't trying," guess what, you'll never win.

Practice! It'll pay off before you know it. And have fun, no one likes a sourpuss. Dance. Laugh. Smile. It makes those grueling hours in the gym a little easier to stomach.

Inspired brilliance is the side effect of believing in yourself. Luck is the side effect of skills honed to perfection in practice. Train until there are no contingencies, no defenses, and nobody who can stand in your way. WinForever.